Tag Archives: extreme

Herbert’s Dilemma

Herbert ‘The Hips’ was king of the surf. Instead of smelling breakfast in the morning, he could smell swells. No wave too big, no reef too sharp, and no curl too curly. But alas, here lay the problem. For Herbert was a man of world, he had conquered all there was to conquer, a new challenge was needed.

Late one Tuesday evening, after a hard fought victory in their regional darts league, discerning Herbert, hunched over a packet of pork scratchings, aired his grievance to team mates, Ollie and Fred “the Shred”.

“It’s lost the buzz, I need something new.”

“Yeah cus, I feel the same way too” pitched in Ollie, a master of the half pipe.

“Ok, but what we gonna do? I love snowboarding. Hey, let’s start an ATB crew!” shouted Fred. Spilling his pint of Admirals in the process.

And the rest, as we can all imagine, was history.

But what was the moral of the story? Is it that pork scratchings are not only a great pub snack, but also a catalyst to enlightenment? Or is the real story, the fact that All Terrain Boarding (ATB), is a sport that combines aspects of different extreme sports to create a unique alternative to its more fashionable siblings. Throw in the ability to ride a variety of terrain, and ATB becomes unlike other board sports.

Photo from: woodiewright.co.uk

Once a rider pads up (always pad up, kids!), said rider must strap feet into bindings, align board in direction of bottom of hill, and let gradient work its gravitational magic. With wheels that can be as large as 13”, an all terrain board is better than a Sherman Tank, for traversing foreign grounds. They are so popular in fact that a National Governing Body was created, otherwise known as the ATBA-UK.

The ATBA-UK was formed to represent and promote mountain-boarding in the UK. As an association, they source funding for issues such as riders safety and training, as well as running competitions and events. One of these performances just so happens to be at X in the City, where we’ll be having demonstrations from the ATBA boarders, and giving you plenty of time to “have-a-go” yourself.

So pad up, strap in, and roll on!

For more information on ATB, and ways in which you can help ATBA-UK as a  volunteer visit http://www.atbauk.org/.

Disclaimer: All characters and events in this blog—even those based on real people—are entirely fictional.

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I have seen the future and it is spokeless…

Alberto Del Biondi’s Spokeless Concept Bike.

I have seen the future and it is spokeless…

When I was young, I had a little, rusty, red bike. It had a horn instead of a bell, and trailing behind were big old stabilizers. The stabilizers transformed my tasty two-wheeler into something that looked more like the complex innards of a clock tower. It had more spokes than you could shake a stick at. Suffice to say, the beautiful morning in ’91, when my father sawed off my stabilizers, became the first day of the rest of my life. I was as fast as Mansell, and as trendy as Hill. Then, 20 years later I saw this…

The Spokeless Concept Bike, courtesy of Alberto Del Biondi. The bike took its place in storecrowd.com’s ‘Top 25 Gadgets for Men 2009’, not only for its novel concept, but also its bold and revolutionary design. Leaving the audience baffled as to its practicality, the bike is a work of art. The bold, black frame is in contrast to the ‘void’ created in the wheel, casting an imposing silhouette.

But this is what we want to see from the creators and craftsmen of this world. An everyday object, recreated with an innovative concept, and beautiful design. All we need now is one of those hoverboards (like out of ‘Back to the Future’), and life will be perfect. Now, where did he put those stabilizers…?

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Can we have a G-1 Glass-Top Pool Table please?!

What we want for Christmas and Birthday combined…

…a G-1 Glass-top Billiard Table!

Over the years I’ve had the chance to play on all sorts of pool tables. Fast, slow, green, blue, drink stained, ripped, sloping. The list goes on. But never have I played on a glass top table. Heck, I’ve never even seen one.

So, when the uber-inventive guys at Nottage, from Australia, came out with a new, futuristic pool table, I had to have a look at it. But how does it work? Surely I won’t be able to screw the white ball off the yellow to leave me on the brown, right?! It turns out I am wrong. It works, apparently, because the playing area is “composed of the patented Vitrik transparent playing surface on top of a 15mm toughened glass top.”

So it plays well, and of course it looks aesthetically orgasmic. The glass is not just for style, it serves a practical purpose as well. Like slate, glass “isn’t prone to sagging or warping, so provides a great alternative…for a game of pool.”

So it’ll stay flat and rigid…great…but what about my backspin? What’s this Vitrik stuff then? Nottage say it “replicates rolling resistance of an average-speed cloth, is hard wearing and allows spin to be applied and retains consistent roll characteristics over it’s lifetime.” Lovely…just what I wanted to hear.

So let’s talk business. How much do you want for it? Their website, http://www.nottagedesign.com/, asks me to shell out $43,900 (AUD). I go to an online money converter and find myself writing an imaginary cheque for a cool £24,668.80!

When you get one, let me know, I’ll come knocking, Jimmy White signed cue in hand.

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